Bad News Hoos

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Confession: I Shit My Pants In The CavMan Suit

Patrick Henry - June 25, 2023 - sports

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This morning BNH received an anonymous email from a person who confessed to shitting their pants at the UVA v. Duke basketball game held in John Paul Jones arena last season. They described the experience in great detail, and we picked out a few excerpts for you below.

“When you’ve gotta go you’ve gotta go, and when the refs called that Duke shot no good, by god I went,” begins the letter. It continues, “luckily the CavMan suit is mostly one piece, so everything just kind of trickled down into my boots and no one saw a thing. When we finally won the game I let out a little victory aftershock, since I knew I had some space left and at that point I might as well lay all my cards on the table.”

BNH reporters are working overtime to try and figure out exactly who is the man or woman behind this travesty. Please reach out to us if you believe you may know the culprit.