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Fraternity Porch Collapses in "Freak Ocurrence"; Skepticism Rises

Patrick Henry - August 21, 2022 - greek-life

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Block party goers were shocked last night when the Delta Sigma Phi house porch collapsed in the middle of Starships by Nicki Minaj. At first, many called this a “freak occurrence”. But, after speaking with some brothers from the frat, it became clear that some foul play was amiss.

“It’s been years since that porch was redone. Now I’m not saying we took a few screws out, or detached a few of the supports, but if we did it would have been for a good reason” said David, a 3rd year brother. “The lengths we need to go to to get funding from the national chapter. It’s sad man” said Kyle, a 2nd year.

Preliminary forecasts sets the O/U at 3.5 porches broken for next years block party as more frats plan to implement this scheme.